Tuesday, 23 September 2008

This is science

Recently I've been getting increasingly bored of been out of work, and what better to stop you going insane than conducting lab experiments to create freaks of nature to add to your ever growing army of the damned? Now this is only going to be a short post so I'm going to keep information on the process short. Basically I wanted something that could electrocute my enemy's whilst been smart enough to randomly torture people as well, for that added extra comedy value I suppose.

After days of researching animals that are pretty good at electrocuting people and animals that are not stupid enough to be confused by a mirror (Dogs, I hate dog
s) I came down to two options, the first was a combination of a dolphin and an eel, but both of them live under water and people, tend not too. This idea was promptly thrown out along with the dead test subjects. But then I had stroke of genius, two of the worlds cutest animals that would make a brilliant combination, I got straight on the phone to Nintendo who are the worlds biggest battery farmer of one of the animals I needed and ran around my local town stealing the other from old people. The answer was now obvious, the combination of a Pikachu and a Cat, a Pikachu is filled with electric, a Cat filled with an unnatural hatred for mankind, the perfect combination for my experiment.

Now I had my test subjects the process of combining them was a simple matter of trial and error, a placed both animals into a special mechanism which I call a "Vice". The process was gruesome but eventually paid off as once the correct amount of pressure is applied the two animals stop exploding and end up combining into one organism...

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